The Travails of the Astounding!

Let's go to an alternate reality where Michael Chabon wrote the Fantastic Four movie, and it didnt suck, and I'm not pissed like the oceans at the moon, at the prospect of another one. In short, his idea was to celebrate the happy world of the Fantastic Four. A shiny gleaming  world of idealism and wonder wherein the Fantastic Four are called upon to battle a more traditional Doctor Doom in a plot that borrows not so subtley from the Terminator series. Now, this next part I've got to quote because he gets it so  right:

The two most obvious choices are Dr. Doom and Galactus. Now Galactus, and the Surfer, have always been favorites, but I'm not sure if we can get the Surfer in there (even if the rights are available) without taking away too much from the FF themselves. And Galactus without the Surfer is awfully dull.

Ahh well... if you can't do one thing right , might as well do six things wrong, eh Tim?

Alright, as some of you might know I've got a place in my heart for comics. They've heavily influenced and fed my joy for filmmaking (more on this later). The medium excels at telling character driven stories about people who live on the fringe, marginalized for their differences, idolized for their power. When done well a comic saga can not only entertain, but thrill, teach, affect. As a child, no book did this more than the SIlver Surfer series. Blessed with immortality and invulnerability he's often dismissed by troglodytes as Marvel's answer to Superman (cause Captain America sucks), however the Surfers quest was more personal, existential. He, an alien, sought to find in himself the magnanimous quality that he saw in man on Earth, and relentlessly quested for that ever elusive redemptive spark. A noble individual, his saga lies deeply entrenched in philosophy and self examination. So imagine how effing thrilled  I am to hear that the rumors are true, the Silver Surfer is coming to the silver screen!! Uh-Oh here comes Captain Reality to gum up the works: A)he's not getting a movie of his own B) he's going to be in the god-forsaken Fantastic Four sequel ::groan:: C)Vin Diesel isn't going to play him, okay I'm kind of pleased about that and D)he's going to be a completely CGI character! All I can hope here is that Tim Story botches it so bad, that in 20 years, yours truly can come along and do it right ala Raimi. Here's fucking hoping kids.